Hindering The Sabotage
To complete our talk on self sabotage, today we will be focusing on self promotion. How is self promotion a way we sabotage ourselves? It's in the fact that we do not do it, or we do it ineffectively.
How many times have you been asked, "So what do you do?" as an icebreaker in a social setting? Usually, we answer with what our job title is, like carpenter or IT specialist. Or what takes up most of our time: parent or volunteer. We then tend to go into a description of the tasks involved in that job, and then reciprocate in asking the other party the same question, and receive the same framed answer back.
Why do we do it this way, and not by sharing the passionate, fulfilling reasons that also incorporate our day. Maybe you can answer with, I'm a gardener or artist, stuck behind a desk during the week. And, OH BOY, you should see how well my zucchini are doing this year! Answer with not only what pays the bills, but also what invigorates your heart and mind.
Being introverted myself, I have also experienced self promotion as that sabotaging behavior instead of it being encouraging and empowering. My go-to reasoning is that when I share what I'm passionate about, I tend to start comparing in my head (see the post about the inner critic for more understanding), and I close up and stop self promoting out of those fears. Maybe someone else stops mid sentence because of the fear of being ridiculed or scrutinized in front of others brings more pain than benefit.
Task: Thankfully, there are ways to grow in self promotion that isn't based on the ego or being stopped by fears. Follow along and see if these could help your circumstances. When sharing a part of you that you want others to know, do so in a tone of voice that would be the same as when you're talking to a friend over coffee or tea. It goes back to that openness/vulnerability with your support group that you have been forming since the beginning of this series. As you share your passion on the project, or task, remind yourself that you are proud of this action/project/etc. and not because you're showing off or proving something. Try collaborating in a work project, or volunteer somewhere that will allow opportunities to hear from others and how they view things, so that you learn new perspectives. Lastly, self promotion done in healthy ways, is a great business strategy! No one would know of your business goals, your passions and the ways you want to help the world, without you sharing it with them! So get out there and start spreading your passionate voice and mind with others!
